Lying Down Beside Perpetrators According to Hellinger

“There is an exercise that helps in such a situation. Each person returns to the situations in which they were at fault, in which they hurt someone, in which they were bad and were the perpetrator. We often do not want to see this, and therefore we repress it. It becomes our shadow, whose existence we deny.

If now—aware of our own guilt and of the evil we have caused—we lie down beside the perpetrators, beside the dead perpetrators, and remain lying there until we become completely calm and united with them, we are reconciled. The perpetrator is reconciled when others lie down beside him. Because the evil done by him comes to an end. And we too are reconciled because—and this is the strangest thing—through consenting to the perpetrator, the evil done by ourselves also comes to an end.

One more thing must be remembered: victims and perpetrators are included in something that acts beyond them. Therefore, it is shortsighted to look only at perpetrators and victims or at the living and the dead. Behind them acts something greater that we are unable to comprehend. I call it the great soul. We are all under its care.”
p. 202 of the book The Essence of Things.

This is a profound exercise, and it is impossible not to appreciate its influence on one’s own soul as well as on the perpetrator’s soul. B.H. uses it, for example, when working with Jewish victims of the Third Reich or with their children and grandchildren. He selects several people as victims and several as perpetrators. He places them beside one another, allowing the situation to develop spontaneously, always moving toward reconciliation. “Perpetrators follow the victims” is knowledge resulting from many years of his work. He also places children beside parents with whom they are in conflict.

I used this technique toward the soul of a living person with whom the relationship was tangled to the highest degree. Any sexual aspects were excluded at the very beginning. I lay down beside her on my back. She lay on her side with her back turned toward me. After a moment she turned toward me and stroked my legs. I saw myself as tiny, and her as great and smiling at me—my former mother from India. (I already knew about that incarnation.) When her soul understood the scene, she bent down and removed two serious energetic blockages that had been placed on me in another Greek incarnation. The soul understood that it had blocked its own material child, his creativity, and his freedom of choice. The whole scene lasted a few minutes. I also heard, “(Mommy) took it off—it was only such a small thing, and you could not cope with it.” For me it took 25 years of life, for my soul about 5,000 years and many incarnations spent together.

For people experienced in the technique, it will be beneficial to consciously lie down beside their own soul. It is enough to imagine that it is someone just like the earthly personality, but immaterial and loving—that is, one’s own soul.

Opublikowano: 14/03/2026
Autor: Sławomir Majda
Kateogrie: Prayer techniques

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